I thought deep on what topic I could write on today and one topic that I am fond of is Honesty.
We used to read in primary classes stories on how honesty is the best policy. We read in Indian scriptures stories of Satyavadi (who speaks truth always) King Harishchandra. How he suffered a lot due to his habit of speaking truth always, and so did his family but in the long run truth won.
Well honesty in my view is much beyond truth, it is being true to yourself. I have this inbuilt hate mechanism for liars-to others and to themselves. I can accept an honest man who takes more money from me by telling the truth or by using his sense of humour, than being cheated. I feel that my marriage has succeeded for 16 years inspite of several ups and downs because we have been honest to each other. In fact the foundation of our marriage was based on honesty as during our courtship days we never lied or misled the other. I was a miser, had family problems, was not very outgoing and was from a small town. My partner also shared her details with me. Inspite of opposition from parents we got married and are living happily together till now.
If I think back, I can see that my closest friends have been those who were always honest with me. My favourite teachers, relatives and acquaintances have been those who were honest.
But there have been some who were not honest with me, and were habitual liars. Most of them got delisted from my favourites soon enough. There was this boy who squeezed his uncle and aunt for money by emotionally blackmailing them and telling lies right, left and centre. I used to adjust to him as uncle was a close friend of father. But I never liked him and still am not very fond of him. One of my ex-bosses did a lot for me by praising me behind my back, getting an award for me and so on. But I have never been able to respect him 100 % as I got to know of his lies and that he was not always honest with me, He dropped name of CEO to motivate me, he told lies quoting seniors to encourage me and put blame on me many a times even when he was guilty. There was this another boss who was all goody-goody but backstabbed me when I needed some help. Then there have been colleagues and seniors who were two-faced and said one thing but did exactly opposite. Such dishonest people are no longer close to me. Another of my weakness being that I can’t put up fake appearance and liking for dishonest and hypocrite people. Any person can read my face and tell that I am angry or upset. Then there are people whom I love, but if they are not honest to themselves, that irritates me and frustrates me.
I have recently seen a newly married couple on the verge of divorce because they were not honest to each other.
Though I have also felt that at times my honesty puts me in difficult situations but till now I have been able to stick to my principles. When I pass on some gift received from others, I can’t say we bought it for you, wify hates that. Similarly when my ex-boss expects me to do things stealthily and not tell my present boss, I feel uncomfortable. And I told that much to ex-boss, saying he should only share things with me on need-to-know basis, because I can’t lie, and even if I do I get caught.
Honestly I love honesty.