After working for 20 plus years, out of which 15 as a manager, i was quite shocked by 2 similar happenings in a month. I consider myself good at emotions and inter-personal relations. so when 2 of my juniors complained same thing to me, i was taken aback.
It’s been only 4-5 months that 5 people have started reporting to me. Prior to that i was one-man army. So a few days back a lady reportee was trying to complain about another colleague in the morning. I had heard similar complaints in the past and was not in mood to hear again. So i told her okay we will take care. She persisted and i also kept repeating the same thing. Suddenly she started weeping. Was a shock of my life. In all the years of service, this was a first that a junior was weeping because of my behaviour and saying, “You always do like that, you don’t listen.” And here i was thinking that i was trying to improve her by making her leave this habit of complaining about others and being negative. She might have had some personal issues at home that day and could have been touchy, but i was the immediate cause of her breaking down. I later adjusted thinking it to be a one-off incident.
Btw today only, a lady colleague while coming to me with a paper told another lady-you carry on, i will follow you. She gave the paper to me and i jokingly said-ok you were going somewhere, we will discuss this when u come back. (I was trying to show I was ok with her taking a break and coming back) And she rudely replied- I was going to loo. (since when have ladies started going to loo together and loudly announcing it). I could understand she was trying to be a smartass, but one has to be careful with ladies so i kept quite.
Coming back to previous incident, last week, a male reportee came with some papers about a job i had given her. I asked him to sit down and tell me what is the progress. He handed me the set of papers. I said, I dont want to read it, just tell me the update. And lo, he started reacting, “Why don’t you listen. I will do whatever you ask me to do but hear me out first.”
This colleague had this habit of going round and round about small issues and not taking even small decisions. So i wanted him to be quick. But his reaction made me think, if i was being snubbish, snobbish or off-handish to my juniors.
I can share this here coz i know no one i know in person reads these blogs so i m safe. And i may get some views of online friends maybe.